my life at my hometown durin holzzz...

it was total relieve after finished my term5 final exam...

and i'm also finally bac to my hometown...

bac at my hometown means i can meet up wif my best buddies, best frenzz and also my relatives and cousins...

dis coming end of d year i was kinda busy of having dinner...

for example my lil cousin 1st bday...

it was on 21/12/09 i had a dinner at my aunty hz

25/12/09 Christmas ! i'm goin to hv dinner at my best frenz hz...

26/12/09 i hv a belated christmas present exchange dinner with all my cousins at my house...

28/12/09 i hv a photographing session with my whole entire family....

29/12/09 i hv a wedding dinner to attend which is my cousin married to a s'pore guy...

31/12/09 i hv count down session with my best buddies and frenz.....

lolx...

it was indeed a busy and fun december to go...

i hope i'll end my 2009 year with full of joy and hapiness...

and now i'll try not to think about u again...

try not to think about u doesn't mean that i don like u anymore..

i jz wana let everythg decide my GOD...

if GOD 1 me and u get together then he'll make us together again in any way he want...

and now i'll let my relationship thingy decide my GOD...

when it comes then i'll accept it..

when it's not then i'll jz b me myself....

Why is dis feeling so weird?

Finally i'm bac at my hometown Kuching...

But, while leaving KL i felt that something i still left there...

it's a strange feeling...

after serious thinking bout that i knew wat is da feeling that i left.

it's da feeling me towards u...

i still hv feel towards u..

i still like u

still love u..

but i knw dis is only mw myself who think i can get bac wif u..

i knw im wrong but i'm still hoping my dis fairy tales dream will cum true 1 day.

for u i'm jz a person which looks familiar but i'm da 1 u r not interested to b fren wif me at all...

for me,

i still wana b ur fren and wana b ur bf s well if God giv me dis opportunity o u giv me 1 more chance.

dis time i reli can felt that my feeling is not da same wif last time...

its vry strong and stable...

everyday i'll sure think of u twice...

wake up in d morning o even go shopping den i saw sumthg u might like but i cant buy it 4 u cz u don even wana to talk to me...

u said to me...

knt b fren b'cz we ever hurt each other.

knt b enemy b'cz we ever love each other...

i oso dunno wat i cn do nw...

bac at my hometown i still thinkong of u nw...

thinking of wat u told me u wana buy at my hometown.

i wana buy for u...

bt scare u don1 it when i pass it for u...

u can 4get everythg that we had been through?

i cant !

Seriously i cant !

cz i'm seriously still love u....

but i knw u r not at all..

ur feeling 2wards me is jz a small lil kids love...

when gt da feel den it's love

when don have den it's u dunno who m i at all not even a fren...

sms u u don1 reply....

i oso dunno wat u r thinking...

but i reli hope that u can reply me and i cn chat wif u when i miss u...

everytime i said i wish u dis wish u that and what hope u can find a husband bla bla bla...

it's all not from my heart..

i jz wana make u happy and willing to b fren wif me..

when i said those wish u what hope u what my heart is seriously unwilling 2 say so...

but wat to do....

i jz wana b ur fren nw 1st...

den when it's time to chase u bac i'll chase u...

i don even care u don accept me at d end but at least i ever appreciate and wana save our relationship bac.

den if u still don1 wana accept me den all i cn do is jz leave u and go...

qing... baby....

i still love u...

reli reli do...

jz u hav to giv me summore time to understand u more....

that all i can say....

hope u saw dis msg which is specially for u....

sorry....对不起。。。

我要说的是你可能误会我了。
我没其他意思只是想让你知道罢了。
可是往往被你误会了。
对，
我承认我说话是非常的直接。
但我没想到会伤到你。
我只是想我想说的话说出来罢了。
我可以说我想把我的悲伤说出来发泄，
所以我把我的悲伤全部都表达出来让我舒服点。
就这样。
希望你原谅我。
对不起。。。。：（
真的真的对不起。
如果你原谅我的话我希望我们还是朋友。

Speechless + big disappointment love

48 days....
we hv been 2gather for 48 days...
and nw...
it's all gone...
from beginning till end it's jz a lie...
i cant believe it...!
i m jz da guy who she need when she was lonely,helpless and need ppl's care..
dis make me feel reli reli sad + angry.....
why cant dis type of thg owes happen to me?
i cook for her, care for her, help her and what she told me is she don need a maid to serve her...
izzit wring that i cook for her?
care for her?
help her?
like dis then im ur maid?
i did dis is because i care for u i LOVE u...
not i wana b ur maid....!
as ur bf i shud do somethg if u need help oso...
like dis oso wrong izzit ???
i'm forced to break wif u....
cz "1 palm cannot slap out sound"
i still love u...
bt u don even love me...
so wat cn i do?
no matter hw unwillingly i don1 to break wif u bt if u insist to break wif me i oso cant do anythg... at last u oso will leave me alone here...
like dis u'll regret that u did not appreciate or even love a good guy like me which i do reli reli love u...
mayb i'm not perfect guy for u bt at least i'm serious 2wards u bt u r not....!
u r jz playing wif ppl's feeling....
i knw u r pretty bt if u keep ur attitude like dis sure u'll regret 1 day..
only rich ppl who gt a lot of money cn satisfy ur need...
money cant show real feeling...
it's jz a piece of paper to cover the ugly side of the ppl who use money to buy ur feelings...
what they 1 is not ur feeling IS ur body !!!
sooner u'll understand dis....
i bet that 1 day u'll regret and the person who uses money to buy ur feeling+body soon will reveal their true face after they are bored wif u...

although im nw looks ok n seems like i reli over u.
bt in my heart the blood non stop bleed and there's countless scar and pain appear in every sec every minutes.

u r among my x which i love da most....
i reli cant let u go.

beacause

I LOVE U !
im trying not to think bout dis again bt it will appear suddenly in my mind and heart which im totally don't prepared for it.
i reli reli reli wana u b mine again if u giv me 1 more chance to chase u back.
bt make sure that u will b serious when together wif me.
i knw dis u or even all of my fren will think im stupid.

u hurt me so much d but y i still 1 u bac

because

my love towards u is real

i reli do Love u..

But,
anyway it's jz wat i think and i wish reli wish....
it will never come true now and forever....

My dear Father Lord,
i pray that u(claire,Ching mei) will happy owes and can find a guy which love u more than i love u and u love him more than u love me. Both of u happily together till the end.
Amen...!

Kitchen Practical + fruit carving

Last week is my last practical class and it's also our kitchen final assesment..

So this is my appertizer and main course....

Japanese deep fry prawn salad serve with handmade mayonnaise and caramel balsamic reduction.
This is also my carving during my last carving class...
mix basic carving flower with leaves and "dragon tail"
it's not reli dragon tail la....
it jz look alike only...
hehe..^^
Now it's end of my term5 d...
it's damn fast man !
i hope college life will b slower bt my dis dream will never cum true...
cz it's is too fast till my diploma course is goin to d end d...
EXAM COMING !!!!
haiz....
after exam HOLIDAYZ !!!
gonna miss my frens at college durin almoz 1 months holidayz...

Gonna miss my BaBy...

hope u'll miss me too....

第一个月 1st month....

today is a valuable day for me..

dis is because 1 months ago which is 20/10/09

i met and get together wif my baby...

Baby !

Happy 1st months !

hope that we will walk together till the end of our life...

And very thank you for dis valuable pen

v

vThanks you baby !

Muackz !

爱老虎油 ！

recently wat i thought of

love is blind

as long as u love her u'll do anythg to make her feels happy

she happy den u'll b happy too.

爱是盲目的，

它可以让一个人不惜一切付出任何代价。

What a day... =.=lll

Today all i can say is sucks.....!
Bad thing all come to me.....
Tiredness of whole day moving here and there...
classes, and kitchen classes....

Recently i felt that lots of people's change due to sumthg or me myself change...
some1's fault make us suffer wif them....
they still like is nt their fault and still ask me to help them...
F**k You !!!
Fren is not like dis...
Fren is who helps u when u nid their help not they help u suffer when u do ur fault den they help u wipe ur f**king ass....!
This not a fren call.......!
Ur attitude like dis will make u suffer in future...!

I pray that God Bless me in study and everything i had own nw...
Amen!